Reflective Blog

Reflective Blog

In my first blog, a short piece of writing, (Appositive) I wrote that I wanted to improve my punctuation usage, understanding of tenses and vocabulary. With regard to tenses, I was advised to give it attention while revising papers; the focus during the draft should be on content. In my latest writing, a take-home essay for Introduction to Shakespeare, (Appositive) I wrote “My experience with reading Shakespeare prior to this class is limited to…” I later read the draft for revision, and noticed the incorrect use of “to be”. The essay was written at the end of the semester, and I was looking back to the start of the semester. Therefore, it should have been “… prior to this class was limited to…”

            In the same essay, I made some changes concerning vocabulary and pronoun usage. “After mentioning to friends that I was taking a Shakespeare class, I got the impression that everyone…” Without loosing the idea of what I was trying to say, I changed it to “… I noticed how everyone…” Overusing the relative pronoun “that” is a pattern I noted while reviewing my own writing during an in-class activity. These changes are examples of how I am trying to focus more on content in the draft, and then changing words and correcting grammar errors while revising. As it was said in class, poor written work is better than no work at all.

            My third goal for the semester, punctuation, (Parenthetical comma) entails multiple subjects. While I said punctuation was important for flow, I now understand it is also important for sentence variety. Using dashes, colons and semicolons demonstrates better mastery of the language as well as creating more opportunities for ones writing. Dashes can be used to add information, draw attention or emphasize; the later shown here: “Benedick does not take the courage to ask for Beatrice’s hand in marriage until after the successful wedding between Claudio and Hero—in front of everyone!” (Dash for emphasis) When the dash adds information in the middle of a sentence, it has the same requirement as the parenthetical comma: the text between the dashes can be removed and the sentence will still make sense. For example, “…it was shown that rimes, songs, games and stories in English—which they could associate with familiar items in Norwegian—helped their understanding of the language.” (Parenthetical dash)

            One of the last topics we covered in class was brushstrokes. This was a new concept to me, and it took awhile to make the connection between the term “brushstrokes”, and how it “paints” the text by adding to it. Appositives are nouns or noun phrases that add a second image to proceeding nouns. Participles are –ing verbs tagged to the start or end of a sentence to add action. Noun Absolutes are modifiers-often participles- that modifies the sentence. “The student’s writing, a more technical text than the others, contains…” (Appositive) is an example of an appositive because it adds an image to the noun “writing”. I made a rather poor attempt incorporating participles in the Student Writing Analysis: “Reading and underlining, I noticed how as the paragraphs develop…” (Participle) I find participles to be more suitable in a sentence where an action is taking place, and using vivid verbs adds additional color to the sentence: “Whacking, shaking and grinding, the golfer had a tough day on the course.” (Participle).

Blog #6

Context

The assignment was to explain the difference between being convicted for civil disobedience and an act of crime. The students, children of Spanish influence, gave three similar responses as far as understanding of the terminology goes (appositives). In the first text, the student knows about possessive apostrophes, but appears to confuse it with plural. “Other time’s person chooses…” There is great variety in the writing style of the three. While the first does a great job experimenting with different sentence types while making more mistakes, the second two are more straightforward. They have few mistakes in their papers; however, their sentences follow a simple and/or compound pattern.

Analysis

In the first two paragraphs, the student uses a mix of compound and simple sentences. However, in last three, the vast majority of sentences are simple and shorter. In the third paragraph, the student writes three consecutive simple sentences “The law interferes with Chris’s usual jog at 9:30pm. Chris figures he will jog in the park anyway. He knows the consequence could be a ticket”. Reading and underlining, I noticed how the sentences differ in the first two compared to the last three (participles). I see two potential reasons for this. The student received feedback from his teacher after writing the first two paragraphs and made some changes to vary the sentence pattern. The other reason could be that the student is afraid of making mistakes, possibly because the teacher dots points for incorrect writing.

The student demonstrates an ability to use different sentence types. “Although in these two cases they were both breaking the law, they had two different points of view”, is an example of a complex sentence. Further, later in the text, the student writes a compound-complex sentence: “Beth decided to break in to a store with a knife and stills the money from the cash register because she was low on cash”.

Question:

Is the first paragraph somewhere close to the context part of the assignment? I plan to add examples illustrating how the students are Spanish influenced. Further, have I described rather than prescribed the material provided?

Does my participle brushstroke fit in with the rest of the paragraph?

Blog 5.5

Deplit's article addresses an issue I think will be challenging to deal with as a teacher. The difficult part will be to balance how much of the mother tongue to incorporate into the lesson. Yes, I agree that as a teacher one should respect the home language of students and use it when teaching SAE, but if one overuses it then the students might not excell in SAE as expected.

While going to school in Norway, I did not experience Ebonics. However, I've experienced discrimination due to differences in dialect. I'm from the northern part of Norway, where we speak what some might categorize as "uneducated". When I served in the Air Force, I noticed how my peers were prejudice and I consequently changed the way I spoke to fit in with the rest. It also had practical advantages in the way that I would not have to repeat myself as often.

My research paper is on the differences between Norwegian and English and how to use the Norwegian language and culture when teaching English as a second language. I further discuss the role English plays in Norway and why it is important to master. Through my reading on the topic I came across an article THAT talked about how children through learning their mother tongue have a good understanding for language, which brought me back to the Deplit article. She encouraged readers to use the students’ abilities rather than forcing them to only learn SAE. If students can see the connection and similarities between two languages they will hopefully become curious and want to explore other languages.

Song re-write

Lyrics

Keep drinking coffee, stare me down across the table
While I look outside
So many things I'd say if only I were able
But I just keep quiet and count the cars that pass by

You've got opinions, man
We're all entitled to 'em
But I never asked

So let me thank you for your time
And try not to waste any more of mine
Get out of here fast

I hate to break it to you babe
But I'm not drowning
There's no one here to save

Who cares if you disagree? You are not me
Who made you king of anything?
So, you dare tell me who to be
Who died and made you king of anything?

You sound so innocent
All full of good intent
Swear you know best

But you expect me to
Jump up onboard with you
Ride off into your delusional sunset

Re-write

You should keep drinking coffee and stare me down across the table while I look outside. There are so many things I want to say, but I just keep quiet and count the cars that pass by. You have your opinions—everyone is entitled to them—but I never asked. Thank you for your time, however, don’t waste any more of mine. Get out of here! I don’t mean to hurt you, but I’m doing fine without you. [She can stand on her own feet and doesn’t need his support]. You are not me, so who cares if you disagree. You were made king of anything by WHOM? Don’t tell me WHO TO BE, or not to be—you are not all-knowing. You sound innocent and full of good intent, and you swear you know best. You want me to follow you into your future, WHICH you can’t expect me to do. [She claims he wants her to follow him wherever he goes, but she has to think of herself]

Explanation

In line three I used the parenthetical dash to add that everyone is entitled to an opinion, WHICH could have been removed from the sentence. In the following sentence, I included however—an adverb—to link the request to not waste any more of her time. In the middle of the paragraph, I changed a sentence to a question so that I could use the relative pronoun WHOM. In this situation, “you” is the subject, which causes the person who made him king of anything, the object and consequently whom. I included another dash, this time to emphasize that whoever she is singing to is not all-knowing. In the last sentence I used the relative pronoun which because that part of the sentence is not essential.

In the rewrite I tried to incorporate rules we have learned thus far in the semester. I had a hard time using pattern of the week because I did not find many places where a relative pronoun would fit to be followed by a relative clause. My goal with experimenting with different topics was to see if I’ve understood the concepts. Your comment will be greatly appreciated.

Do most teachers mark the incorrect use of who/whom in formal writing? Further, should I use whom in everyday speech to better understand when to use it?

Revision of old writing

Original

Through my upbringing on a farm, I have become attached to animals, primarily large animals.  I’ve been told I was milking cows as soon as I could walk.  Instead of going to kindergarten, I helped my father on the farm. On multiple occasions I have had the opportunity to watch veterinarians at work up close, and have developed an affinity for what they do. There is a variety of jobs do be done on large animals such as cows and sheep, including treating a sick animal, helping out if there are complications with birth, sowing open wounds and giving medicine to prevent diseases. I was also fortunate enough to spend a year as a dog handler in the Norwegian Air Force. I had the same dog for ten months and grew very close.  Every day we did a basic check of our dog, the purpose of it was both bonding and most important of all; to make sure the dog was in good condition. I experienced my dog being bit by one of the other dogs in our department, and consequently having to go to the vet where I observed the veterinarian sow stitches where she was bit.

Revision

While I grew up on a farm, I became attached to animals—primarily large animals. I helped my father with work on the farm instead of attending kindergarten.

I have multiple times observed veterinarians during work, causing me to become interested in the profession. There is a variety of jobs to be done on large animals such as cows and sheep. These include the following: treating a sick animal, assisting complicated births, sowing open wounds and giving medicine to prevent diseases.

While I served as a dog hander in the Norwegian Air Force, I worked with the same dog for ten months. We became attached BECAUSE OF ALL THE TIME WE SPENT TOGETHER. Every day we did a basic check which served the following purposes: bonding with the dog and making sure it was in good condition. One time, my dog was bit by another dog in the department. We quickly brought her to the veterinarian where I observed the procedure of sowing stitches.

The paragraph I’ve used is from a paper I wrote in a class I took while I attended Western New Mexico University. I quickly noticed that I started multiple sentences with “I…”, which I in some cases have tried to mix up to create more variety. In the first sentence, I used the dash to emphasize that I’m primarily interested in large animals. WHILE I’VE PREVIOUSLY BEEN CRITICAL OF USING COLONS, I used a colon twice in the revised paragraph. Another pattern I noticed in this paragraph—and the whole paper for that matter—is the overuse of prepositional phrases. My only logical explanation is that I was having a hard time meeting the minimum page requirement and consequently used unnecessary fillers. In the revision I’ve replaced the prepositional phrases with verbs or phrases that are more direct. In my eyes it did not look right to transform the prepositional phrases into adverbs or adjectives such as the Lanham Method recommends.

What are the components to a compound-complex sentence, and can someone please give an example of one? I did not get around to write it down during class.

Blog post #3

During the last two lectures we’ve focused on pronouns and adverbs. When working with pronouns, I found it TREMENDOUSLY useful to repeat the difference between subjective and objective case in sentences. I didn’t know how or when to use “whom” before it was explained during class on Tuesday. It’s used when asking about the objective in a sentence, i.e. “Whom are you calling”. In this question, “you” is the subjective case because “you” is calling, while whom is the objective case because it is referring to who the subject is calling to. Another example is “The tiger ate whom?” The “tiger” is the subjective case while “whom” is the objective case.

Adverbs are describers which modify verbs, adjectives or other adverbs. The word-class which it is often confused with, adjectives, modify nouns and other adjectives. To determine whether a word is an adjective or adverb, check if it can be moved around in the sentence. “The soup was hot” can only be written that way. If I try to move it around “Hot was the soup”, or “The soup hot was”, it becomes what was referred to in class as “Yoda syntax”, after Yoda from Star Wars. Adverbs, on the other hand, can be moved around. “THE MAN CLIMBED EFFORTLESSLY TO THE TOP” (Effortlessly, the man climbed to the top. The man climbed to the top effortlessly. The man effortlessly climbed to the top). This demonstrates how the adverb “effortlessly” –which describes the verb “climbed” –can be moved around in the sentence.

In last weeks blog I was unsuccessful in my attempt of incorporating the parenthetical dash into a sentence. The sentence does not make sense when I remove the dashes, which is a criterion for using it. A correct way of using the parenthetical dash is “During WWII, Norway was occupied by Germany–who attacked using blitzkrieg–from April 9th 1940 to May 8th 1945.

I don’t fully understand the use of colons; does the content before the colon have to be a complete sentence, but what comes after does not? I remember it was discussed in class, but I don’t remember the specifics. Further, why is a comma not strong enough to splice a complete sentence?

Blog post #2

During the first two weeks of class, I’ve learned how to use semicolons and dashes. Previously, I’ve not used semicolon or dashes in my writing because I didn’t know where or how to use them. Now I understand that semicolon can be used to link two independent clauses that share a common thought. The independent clauses can be individual sentences. An example of using semicolon is “John practiced his chemistry skills all weekend; his effort paid off on the test the following week”. Another way of using semicolon is to separate a list of items that includes commas, i.e. “Petter Northug, Norway; Axel Teichman, Germany; Vincet Vittoz, France”.  To be honest, I don’t see the purpose of using semicolons in writing. Why not just use a comma, and follow up with an “and” before the next independent clause? It would make it easier for the average person who’s reading the text and the author would not have to think twice about formulating the sentence.  

Dashes are used to emphasize something in a sentence. There are two kind of dashes, Em ( − ), which are used with words, and En (-), which are used with numbers. “Alan goes to school in Minnesota−it can get very cold there in the winter” is an example of the first, while “The price range was $5-$10 for the shirt”. Although I did not know there were two different kinds of dashes, I can remember noticing different sizes during my reading sometime in the past. Now that I understand the usage of the Em dash, I’ll pay more attention to what is being said when I see one as it is intended to grab the reader’s attention.

I enjoyed reading Linda Christensen’s article about her experience with English and ideas on how to teach it to school children. My own experience is not as terrifying, but I recognize the stories about spending hours memorizing grammar rules and not being able to explore or incorporate it into my writing. I think most students dread the grammar classes because it is taught in a poor way. If it is taught correctly–GRAMMAR CAN BE FUN–and teach students life-long lessons. By involving students the way we were in class, it will easier for them to remember how a certain rule works by creating a more conductive environment for learning.

Some of the examples of colon usage in our text book, More Nitty-Gritty Grammar, don’t look right to me. I understand that because they are in a text book they are most likely correct, but I don’t like the way they look. Similar to the semicolons, I don’t understand why comma can’t be used in place of the colon. There are times I see the benefit of colon, such as before a long quotation or when listing time. When listing names, such as the example of which athletes dominating track and field, I’d rather use a comma because I feel it creates a better flow in the text.